TRENCH COAT
[towards Bob]
Psst.BOB stops; looks around, unsure.
TRENCH COAT
[again]
Psst.BOB
[looking back at the man]
I'm sorry are you "pssting" at me.TRENCH COAT
[mysteriously]
Come 'ere.BOB
What?TRENCH COAT
Come over 'ere. I've got...something to show you.BOB
[begins walking again]
No thank you.TRENCH COAT
Psst.BOB
What?TRENCH COAT
Psst.BOB
I heard you! TRENCH COAT
Don't you wanna see what it is?BOB
Of course I want to see what it is!TRENCH COAT
Then come 'ere.BOB
[hesitant]
It's just...my mother always told me not to talk to strangers. Especially those hanging around in dark alleys in long overcoats pssting at me.TRENCH COAT
Your mother sounds like a very smart lady.BOB
Thank you.TRENCH COAT
But a stranger is just a friend you haven't met yet, eh?BOB
You--he--could also be a mass murderer I haven't met yet.TRENCH COAT
You don't think I'm a mass murderer.BOB
How do you know that?TRENCH COAT
I noticed you haven't walked away yet. You're curious, huh? You're curious, aren't you?BOB
Curiosity killed the cat.TRENCH COAT
Satisfaction brought him back.Pause.
BOB
Is that true?TRENCH COAT
Come 'ere.BOB
I really should be going...TRENCH COAT
Come 'ere. I just wanna show you somethin'. BOB
[moving closer]
Well...TRENCH COAT
That's right.BOB
I guess, just for a minute...TRENCH COAT
That's right. BOB moves right up to the man in the trench coat who stands grinning.
TRENCH COAT
That's right, that's right.BOB
All right, what is it?TRENCH COAT
This.TRENCH COAT pulls out a billy-club and smacks BOB up-side the head. BOB falls to the ground, unconscious. TRENCH COAT kneels down and starts searching through BOB's pockets; pulls out BOB's wallet.
TRENCH COAT
You shoulda listened to your mutha. Puts the wallet in his pocket and runs off. A KID'S SHOW HOST enters, maybe even a Sesame Street-style puppet?
HOST
Trench Coat Charlie is right, kids: DON'T TALK TO STRANGERS.
Oh, and don't worry, boys and girls: Bob's okay. He's just going to wake up with a bad concussion. See you next week kids!
HOST exits, leaving BOB on the ground. Blackout.
3 comments:
What the hell, lol.
Your writing keeps me guessing, which is fun.
I could see some of these being performed in "Too Much Light Makes the Baby Go Blind"
I think in your next life (the one after Maine) that could be a consideration?
Chicago is kind like Maine and cool like NY.
Just a thought.
Well it was very neat... But you will never have a life after Maine because we will not let you go... So disregaurd Taylor because you will never ever be permitted to leave. The kids of the nokomis drama club would then be forced to become stalkers and follow.. and personally I enjoy Maine so I'd like it better if you would stay here :-)
Good Mihalik, I never knew that second line in the cat thing until just now, even if you made it up.
Post a Comment